My heart breaks to share this here but our daughter who broke up with her boyfriend last Christmas and had the drinking problem in April is gone.  She took her life in September and left no note, and no indication that anything was wrong.  By all intents and purposes she seemed happy and getting her life on track. She had a great job with excellent pay, was living the corporate life, had lots of friends and a busy social life and was due to fly overseas for a 5 week holiday only a week later.

It has been 3 weeks now and we still don’t know why she did this.  What tipped her over the edge?

Once again my husband and I are going through intense periods of anger (how could she do this to us?, who told her how to do that?  who is responsible?) and extreme grief and pain.  Why didn’t we see any signs?  How could we have stopped this? What did we do wrong?

Whilst we know in our heads the answers to some of these questions our hearts just won’t believe the answers.  We’re told that often those who take this action do not let on and appear happy on the outside to all.

We cannot help but think that the path she took in her early teen years, shortly after learning that what her grandfather did was very wrong, has led to this result with disastrous consequences.  Will we ever feel happy again?  Will life ever feel normal again?  It doesn’t feel like it will.

This entry was posted on Friday, October 17th, 2008 at 3:13 am and is filed under Our Experience. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.